This past weekend I took our Princess up to my alma mater where her sister is also a student for their annual event, where alumnae are encouraged to bring young women of all ages to visit as prospective students. I enjoy it immensely as it has become something of a mini-reunion with fellow classmates, and it culminates in a scholarship fund-raising theater event–STUNT–which I loved when I was there and still love now.
Our Princess has enjoyed going for the past two years, and this year was no exception. She had her “bag” packed by the middle of last week and woke up on Saturday SO excited. She knows her way around campus very well, and she has the routine of the day down by now. However, they did something new this year as an icebreaker. The younger set of students played a game of “Sardines,” which has best been explained to me as a game of reverse hide and seek. One person hides, and as you find her, you join her in her hiding spot, until there is one person left seeking all of you.
My girl ditched me and her bags faster than you can say “Golden Heart” (the class she will be at Wesleyan) and headed out for the game. I was tempted to follow her out into the hall, but I didn’t. I let her play and found myself holding my breath. Worrying about how close she could potentially be with others who might have just eaten some of her allergens made me nervous. I sat there, worrying and yet amazed at how eager she was to go play with these other girls, some of whom she sees once a year and some whom she had never met. She had a great time, and all was well. Then it was on to the mini-STUNT scripting activity, and after we took a break during the campus tours. Later we joined all the others by the fountain for supper (we always brown bag these events), and then it was time for a pep rally and off to the main event in the auditorium.
A great night. Aub was a part of the team who put the whole thing together, and they did a fantastic job.
On our way home after 11 p.m. that night, I asked our Princess what her favorite part of the day had been. I was sure it was going to be our visit to the campus store or her beloved Golden Hearts winning the STUNT Cup, but no.
“It was when we played Sardines in Taylor Hall, and then later when we played a modified version around the fountain after supper.”
Of course. Her two favorite times were when I wasn’t hovering. Obsessing over clean hands and what she might be exposed to in the midst of a day outside our norm.
Bless her. Her two favorite times were both when she had handed me the epipen case she wears cross body style whenever we leave home. The two times when she let loose and was just another kid running around with friends and some who will be.
It’s hard, isn’t it? This whole parenting thing and knowing when to let go and when to be on guard. Add in a life-threatening allergy (or any number of other health issues), and the difficulty level in being a good, balanced parent grows exponentially.
I’m glad she had a great time. I’m thankful she was safe. I don’t know what the answer is, from one situation to the next–how vigilant to be without being obsessed and way overprotective. There’s no precedent here for me, and I’m just doing the best I can in any situation we find ourselves in. It was bittersweet to be reminded that she only wants what the rest of us want–to fit in and be a part of a good time and not be reminded of what weighs us down.
May we all have those precious moments.
Love to all.