So there was this sign out yesterday a couple of streets over, advertising that there was going to be a neighborhood meeting tonight. I texted with my sweet neighborfriend, curious if she or her husband were planning on attending. I had a question or two, and I’d been trying to figure out how I could make it work so I could go. But it wasn’t looking promising.
“Probably not,” she wrote back. “It doesn’t even say where it is.”
Huh. You know what, she was absolutely right.
Y’all, there I’d been spinning my wheels trying to head in a direction that I didn’t have a clue about.
Not the first time that’s happened on this journey. I found it ironic that in all of my planning and thinking it all through, the ultimate direction I needed to go wasn’t even part of the equation.
All too often, my friends. All too often.
This evening I sat at the pool, watching Cooter practice and trying to keep from getting chilled (it was in the 60’s–brrrr!), and I thought about the folks at the meeting. The ones who planned it and set the sign out, letting the rest of us know about it.
Don’t you know they were sitting over there (Wherever THERE was), wondering why no one else was showing up?
Folks, if you don’t tell people where you are, how are they going to meet you there?
I have friends who are able to speak to their pain, their sadness, their worries, their struggles, and I admire them for that. We can’t walk alongside them, toting a light to help see the path or help them up when they stumble if we don’t know WHERE THEY ARE, can we?
And yet, how often do we think we’re leaving signs that we are struggling or upset or overwhelmed and get our feelings hurt when no one shows up to say, “I’m here– I’ll sit with you in this darkness,” when we would be so much better off if we just came out and said exactly how we are hurting?
No? Just me? Okay then.
Tonight I’m thankful for my neighborfriend reminding me that if we don’t have directions, there’s no sense in worrying over if we can get there or not. And I’m thankful for the folks who speak from their hearts and let me know where they are and how I can help. Most of all, I give thanks for the ones who come to my side when I do speak up about the hard things, when I show them where I am. I couldn’t keep traipsing along without them.
Leave a map, y’all. Folks want to be there, but you have to be brave and let them know where you are.
Love to all.
2 thoughts on “Telling Folks Where to Go”
That is so true. I so agree with what you are saying. How is anyone going to know you’re hurting or in need of help if you don’t let him know? Sometimes we just want to wallow in self-pity or hope others notice that something’s bothering us. Then we get mad or wallow more in the self-pity pit when no one comes to us.
We do want to wallow, and we often “vague book” so others will ask what is wrong. Thanks for reading and for sharing your thoughts. Here’s hoping we can learn to speak up for ourselves and ask for what we need when we are struggling.