Today as the crew and I began the work of coming to terms with our shock and grief, we did what we have done in the past when the pain has been great. We circled the wagons and hung close together.
Aub had a couple of things she needed to do at school and I had a couple of errands to run as well, so we all loaded up and headed out. Together.
This meant that when we got home, there were a fair number of things that still needed tending to.
I asked different children, usually in pairs or all three, to take care of one task or another.
Not once, but twice, I got the blank stare, no action, and I heard the “Well, what about _______? She/He isn’t…..”
No. Unh uh. Not even.
I will turn this house. Upside. Down.
Not even joking.
We are all a little tender right now, so I tried to give some grace, but just no.
What if WE ALL waited to tend to what we could do on the list of what needs doing in our world–what if we all stood around waiting on so and so to do THEIR part first, and then we’ll get on it?
I am having none of that, I tell you what.
My dear sisterfriend who left this world on Monday was having none of that either. She saw a need and she got on it. She didn’t wait on you or me to get in there and stand alongside her. She fed people, and then the rest of us joined her. She loved all, and we learned to do so too. She kept on standing up for folks who weren’t being heard, and we began to see and hear them and follow her example.
She didn’t let any dust settle around her feet. She was always moving toward the goal of following in the dust of the Rabbi, loving and caring and speaking out for folks.
Tonight I am thankful for her and the life she lived. I am thankful for this zany bunch I get to call mine for a time. I love them dearly at the same time that they make me question my sanity. As they stare at me, wanting to know why their siblings aren’t being called to task, I remember that we are all on a learning journey, works in progress, and I have hope. And patience. Just like my Mama and my sisterfriend and my Aunt and so many others have had with me.
May none of us ever sit around waiting for another to step in and get things started…..
Love to all.
2 thoughts on ““Well, What About Them?””
Be kind to yourself. It is a hard week. But I know what you mean. When one kids complains they are doing more than another,I just make up more work for everyone to do.
Thank you for the grace, Dena. I like your method of handling it though. Making a note of that. Much love.