far worse than a tummyache

my little guy came in from his shower tonight,

crying with a tummyache

he couldn’t decide if it was hunger

or something else

I treated it with a ginger cookie,

a cold drink, and love

 

and I thought about how thankful I am

that tummyaches are treatable

and how I hope he is still years away

from the untreatable, unfixable ache

 

that of the heart

 

when the heart is in pain

there is no cure

but time,

and even that is never a steady

or hurried or permanent fix

 

the symptoms can return

at any time

 

tears, panic, sadness, worry,

not understanding,

wondering why

 

the pain of losing someone,

of watching justice come undone

at the hands of those we trusted,

the people who make promises

and then soon forget,

those who misuse the power

and leave folks hurting and in need,

those who forget about loving people first

and getting ahead second

 

the hurt and pain can come back again

and again

despite the passage of time

 

and as I watch his peaceful slumber

no trace of pain left to see

I am thankful for ginger cookies

and cold drinks

and those little hands I love to hold

and I wish I could find something

that would give me and my heart

a peaceful night of rest

as well

 

the pain of heartache–

of questioning why–

can be hidden behind a mask

and carried well over time,

but in the dark of night

and the quiet of the solitude,

the questions echo loudly–

and the pain becomes once again

an open, gaping wound

that knows no cure

 

and so we love…..

and wait.

 

 

 

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