We had a house full of fun little folks today. They played and ran and talked and got to know each other in such a way that I am convinced the littles in this world should be in charge of peace negotiations.
They know what’s most important.
Like favorite colors, how to ask for what they really want, favorite Star Wars characters, how to share dressup clothes and stickers, and how to use their imaginations. They are kind and even when it’s hard, they acquiesce and take turns when they are reminded that’s how we roll.
At one point Cooter, all decked out in his shield and body armor and sword (thank you GW Boutique), came up behind me and announced in his “announcing” voice: “I’m a bad guy. I hurt people.”
And then he ran off. To wreak havoc and make superheroes cry, I guess.
He’s a cute little guy, but he’s so much more–sometimes the words that come out of his mouth really make me think.
Like in this instance.
Because what has weighed on my heart today is that it’s not always the bad guys who hurt people. Their feelings and emotions and sense of being okay. In many cases, it’s the people we hold near and dear who really hurt us the most. Or whom we hurt. Without even thinking.
The hurt that is caused by “bad” guys is bad, but the hurt that is caused by someone whom we think loves us–whether intentional or not–that pain goes much, much deeper.
And it takes a lot longer to heal.
I am glad that my seven-year old son sees the world in black and white right now. It hasn’t been long since I realized there are all these shades of gray out there. I have often heard and even quoted, “Hurting people hurt people.” And while I think that’s true, I think it’s important to realize that not all hurting people are bad. In fact many are good–they’re just going through something that is causing them heartbreak and pain, and that gets passed along.
Tonight I’m thankful for the words of my little guy that have me looking at my heart and thinking about the pain I’ve caused, some inadvertently and some, I’m ashamed to say, not. I wonder how much longer before his world gets rocked and he figures out all who hurt others are not bad.
It’s a lesson I needed reminding of today.
Love to all.
2 thoughts on “Bad Guys and Hurting People”
Interesting perspective. I agree that hurting people hurt people. My SIL is one such person. She isn’t happy and is very needy. And she pushes away those of us who would like to love her. So sad to watch and hurtful to be her target.
I am so sorry Heidi. That she is so unhappy and needy. And that she is hurting those who care the most. It’s a hard place to be for you all. I hope that healing can happen one day. Soon. Thank you for reading and sharing your story.