I finally got around to unpacking the kitchen box from my Mama’s that I had here. Mess Cat did a beautiful job of packing it. Everything was safe and sound, wrapped in Mama’s cloth napkins and placemats.
For years Mama used thin cloth napkins folded into a square to catch the sweat from her and Daddy’s drinking glasses, thus preventing sweat rings on the table, the desk, or her side table in the living room.
As I was folding Mt. Washmore today, I came to her napkins. It was amazing. Some of them, after so many years of being folded in just the same way, even after being machine washed and dried, held their creases and were almost perfectly folded even after being soaked and tossed and thrown around under extreme heat.
Sometimes we are like that, right? Something is so ingrained in us after years and years of doing things the same way, that no matter the pressure, the hard times, we’re still going to do them exactly the same.
And I think sometimes that’s a good thing. To be strong and consistent and hold our own in the face of adversity. Of loss, pain, or grief.
But sometimes maybe it’s not.
Sometimes maybe we should let some of the things we go through reshape us–maybe we shouldn’t fight the change so hard.
A very wise therapist I know once talked about a furrowed field. All the rows and lines, all nice and orderly, freshly plowed, ready for things to grow. But when a storm hits, the field goes back to how it was before the furrowing. When adversity comes along, it returns to its old patterns, its old way of being.
His point was we can think we are changed, ready for new growth, but when something hard happens, we tend to go back to our old ways of coping, of handling it.
And sometimes that is not healthy.
Tonight I’m thankful for some things that never change, like my Mama’s cloth coasters. And their creases. And I’m thankful for some of the things that do change. Things that have me stepping outside my comfort zone. Like writing and reading new books and meeting new people and sharing stories.
We have the power to do both within us–to change and to stay the same. The true power is knowing when to do what.
Love to all.